Half Baked and Half Naked

Archive for the ‘Drunken’ Category

It is official, I am having another little girl. Due date didn’t change, still August 16.

So this proves that my Hot Boyfriend only makes girl babies! It’s ok by me though!




All I am going to say for right now is that my Hot Boyfriend is amazing (sweet nothings!), and that my best friend has a nice rack, and good taste in women!

More later,


So, sometimes my mind draws a blank.


Like right now.


I want to be writing about my eventful day in court on Wednesday, but for some reason, everything I write sounds like shit to me. To sum it all up; I wasn’t charged with a DUI at all, because as the Public Defender said: “It looks like the officers that arrested you realized along the way that they screwed something up really bad, so they decided to charge you with the only thing they actually had you on.” 

Apparently, I passed the field sobriety test with 100% (I have always been an over-achiever!), and there wasn’t even any test results from the piss test they made me take, in my file. Could my luck get any better? The PD also told me that since I was being charged with driving on a suspended license, I could go get my license back at the DMV, and probably have that charge thrown out as well. I go back to court on December 13, so I guess we will see what happens. 

I fell so lucky to have gotten through this with nearly no damage done. Yes, I have had to bum rides from people for the last three months, but it kind of helped me realize who I could really depend on for support when I need it. Thanks god for Lush and my Hot Boyfriend, or else I would have spent many a night bored off my ass.

This weekend will be a lazy one, with my parents out of town, and no birthday parties to take Kamy to (thankfully!); I figure I will be playing lots of games with her during the day, and drinking lots of beer at night. I need to save up my energy though, my birthday is coming in 5 days and I plan on being fucked up for a majority of it. 

A full week of posting now, and only three and a half more to go during NaBloMoPo. 

Will write more tomorrow, 


Yeah, I am already six beers in.  Need I say more?


Thats right, I just got off the phone with a DUI attorney. The retainer fee is $8g’s, of which I have maybe 1/16 if I am lucky.

Donations anyone?

Scrounging for change,



This past weekend was spent in Lake Havasu, playing in the water and drinking as much beer as was humanly possible. Lush and I got a chance to be away from the local bar scene, and rock the house at two places we had never been before.


After securing our girls in the comfort of her parents trailer, with her sister to baby-sit, Lush and I made our way to a hole-in-the-wall casino, where we definitely exceeded our own expectations. Being that she has only ever seen me totally wrecked maybe twice, I felt it was my civic duty to my best friend and my own self, to go ahead and get completely hammered. I did just that.


What began with a few beers (a few being like, ten) while swimming in the lake, turned into a few more at the casino. I even gambled away some money playing blackjack and didn’t care, because I was getting drunk dammit. Those beers turned in to a shot of Tuaca for both me and my lovely drinking partner; which then turned into a few more beers. Some EXTREMELY drunk patron of the bar then proceeded to buy me a shot of Jaeger, which I swallowed very happily. Then I drank more beer, which is not usually a good idea, because for me, mixing Jaeger and beer is a good way to make myself spew chunks wherever I am; but I didn’t, and boy was I proud of that.


Once the casino got old, we then made our way to the best little dive bar ever; The Sail Inn, where we walked into a bachelor party in full swing (minus the strippers, unfortunately) and Karaoke. We got some more beers, and I sang a song. After a few minutes, it was requested of me that I sing a certain country song most recently made popular by one Carrie Underwood – one that has to do with something I know all too well – a cheater and revenge. Once I was done there, someone from the bachelor party decided he needed to buy me a shot of Whiskey, but I opted for another of Tuaca, because that tastes good. It was then decided that I was going to make the groom take a “Blow Job” shot from between my boobs . . . a little spillage later, and I have the best man “cleaning up” the leftovers.


We closed the bar, literally to the sound of “get the hell out we need to close up”. Lush and I decided to go for a walk on the beach, of which we had one of the most hilarious encounters. Here we are, stumbling along the pebble filled beach at 2:30am, when what do we see?


A donkey, just chillin, right there in front of us.


We give each other a look, and trip the fuck out. After chasing the donkey for a distance unknown, we give up hope, and go back to our trailer where we commence the drunk eating and laughing. Lush somehow ate shit walking down three stairs so I picked her up, and we giggled ourselves to sleep. An awesome end to an even better day.


Worth every minute of hangover,



Lush and I are going to spend this weekend getting drunk in Lake Havasu. I was kind of sad to find out the the Hot Guy is going camping at Leo Carillo, but at least I know he will be safe with some of his good friends.

I plan on drinking endless amounts of Kettle One and Sunny Delight, and winding up with a sunburn (I don’t tan, I fry, and there is no other option – I have accepted that fact). I hope your weekend ends up as good as mine is going to be.

Drunk and Unruly,


PS: I will post pictures, especially if there are naked ones! xoxo